Tell me, [%userclass]--what is it that I can do for you?

If it isn't the young and illustrious [%username]! Come to join the bureaucracy of Pandaemonium?

Monsters and warfare are far less terrifying than petitions, reports, and accounting.

Thrilling, don't you think?

"Somehow I doubt that." "Erm...bored now."

In my hands rests the fate of all Asmodae, [%userclass]. While you flit around the Abyss flashing off your wings, I am here making sure civilization doesn't break down.

"How melodramatic."